When is Forgiveness a virtue ?

When is forgiveness really a virtue .... or is it something we have created out of mear weakness.... when we know we can do nothing about the situation.... but bear it..??!!!!!!

Its amazing how you keep unraveling about yourself as you add layers to your age.. I blame on age... my this recent realization :)

I realized in every messed up situation I had to face.. I chose to ignore it and kept quite.... shut my eyes close and walk past it as if it did not exist.. .. to call a spade a spade .. and not ignore it ...when families are involved is a toughie... and I proved weak in doing so.. I chose to bear it and ignore it... and cover it with so called "forgive and forget".... and not only me I am sure there will be so many others who would have felt this situation in their lives....

 In every sour situation life threw at me ...I thought.... I had forgiven everyone and moved on.. but fact was..I really had not.. I had not forgiven anyone.. till date, I am holding on to the pain which shows up every time I meet these situations/people... 

Now the point here is not, who all did it... what happened and stuff.. point here is my own realization regarding how I had unknowingly held on to so much hurt and pain internally and kept it bottled up for so long that it had started to bother my external life ...I realized that ignoring situations, had lead me to where I was today.. things had started to bother me and I was forced to think about my own liberation.. I had to.... had to ....find, how to get out of it...

At this junction a thought flashed..may be I should truly forgive ... but then again...... I wasnt sure.. if this really would be called forgiveness????.... ......  I felt it would be running away ....AGAIN.. ....................since I had no other option but to live with it... its like trying to shove things under the carpet... carpet of "forgiveness"...

I realized .....Forgiveness as a virtue ... ONLY when you have full control over a situation, where tables have been turned, in your favor this time ...and its then you choose not to hurt those who had hurt you in past... that is when it is a virtue... In every other case..... where one has not experienced this opportunity, its as I said earlier,... shoving things under the carpet, since you can do nothing about it..and hence are trying to console yourself by saying you have forgiven..... .

After a lot of pondering I came to conclusion that,  FORGIVENESS IS A VIRTUE , RARELY ... as its situation dependent... and most of the time is just... a fake version of it.... it is being a coward...

I hope and wish, we all get a chance to experience forgiveness as  a "Virtue" .. and not just a fake version of it...which we so live our day to day lives...

cheers
Havisha

Media and Women in Indian politics

Its a nice bright sunny morning and I sit to enjoy my hot cup of ginger tea.. and out of habit open web page to check the news on TOI. The head lines that caught my eyes had 2 women in administration playing dirty politics..

Mamta banerjee as usual threating .. and mayawati as usual trying to immortalize herself by making several status of herself. I am glad she is restricted only to UP had it been the world .. in US instead of status of liberty it would have been Mayawati standing on top of elephant and holding a flag asking for reservation all around the world.

Mrs Sushma swaraj ( Oppose oppse what ever the other party says irrespective of fact if its good for nation or not) , hema malini ( just sit in parliament and see if she can find a good match for her Esha) , Jaylaitha (Make tamil as International language) , jaya prada (Sorry mam last I heard you speak was when amar singh was hospitalized dont know what else to put to your credit besides being amar singh supporter), jaya bacchan ( Mam you do speak a lot, sarcasm sarcasm and sarcasm, but not even once have we heard you spk about what is your contribution in parliament, ), Mamta banerjee (curse for calcutta, who has zero business acumen required for the state), Mayawati (when  thousand headed cobra , thousands in number, die one mayawati was born) .. few names that are proping up.. One who tops the list, sadly is none other, than our ever so dormant, ribbon cutting president, Pratibha Patil...As a women, I feel ashamed of above mentioned names, Sp our POLITICAL DECORATIVE PIECE Mrs Partibha Patil.. Some one please please ask her..MADAM, AAP KARATI KYA HAIN ???? 

By naming all these I only have one question,.. what on earth happened to making of ladies like, Rani laxmi bai, sarojni naidu, was it just a phase and India is no longer capable of making such women of susbtance ?? ON second thought,  I am sure these still exist.. but TRP hungry media is only highlighting area where political parties want them to focus... news is no longer making public aware .. its about what gossip will sell and for how much.. what drama will pull more audience.. and how spicy can you make it.. SAD...

I personally feel women are a superior being.. at emotional and mental level... we have capability to survive   multiple scenarios compared to men... and this I feel makes it even more important for a women to be more perfect in her approach and dealings and what she teaches her sons and daughters... It is sad to see women getting selfish in there personal levels and leading the county to destruction.. men in national and international history have proved innumnerable times how they create destruction.. like land accusitons , trying to destroy one whole sect of plp( jews), religious manuplations etc etc... but now a days I see women making sure they are not left out.. and have started selling nation for their personal gains or interests. and sadly enough all these women in political arena seem to be following this route..

I am ashamed of these ladies.. even though being  born in such a rich and beautiful hertiage bearing country like India they chose to downgrade themselves.. shame be on them.

Free thinker
Havisha